The Power of No


“No” builds confidence

Have you ever wanted to say no to something but just couldn’t?  I believe it has happened to all of us at one time or another.  Not saying no has lead me to be a scout leader, PTA officer, bake brownies, chaperone field trips of pre-teens, accept the bad behavior of others, and so many other things.

Ahh…the freedom you get when you learn to say no to the right things.

What would have happened if I had said no?  Let’s dive into that. Saying no to something you don’t want to do builds your confidence.  When your no is received and accepted you will begin to see how easy it was.  As a result you will start to say no to more things that you really don’t want to do.  Your no will give you space to say yes to the things you really want to do.  Take back your time and schedule.

Saying no is a complete sentence. 

Often we feel we must explain, qualify or quantify our no.  That isn’t necessary.  The next time you are asked to bake brownies for the PTA bake sale and you don’t want to do it say no.  There is no reason to give an explanation.  If you think just saying no is too harsh, maybe add “I can’t do it this time, may be another time.”  Often we think we have to give a long drawn out explanation of why we are saying no.  You don’t.  No is a complete sentence.

Saying no gives another a chance to say yes. 

yes success and achievement. happy joyful smiling girl making a win gesture. excited thrilled woman portrait on pink background.

Do you feel you are the first person asked to do something?  “Call Barbara; she will do it.”  Maybe you’re called because the powers that be know you will say yes and they don’t have to look down the list of potential volunteers.  If you say no, others will be asked.  The circle of volunteers will grow.  Somewhere there is a quiet, highly talented woman waiting to be asked.  Because you always say yes, she is left sitting on the sidelines.  Saying no allows her to say yes and shine.  And that builds her confidence.

The most important no…

And the most important is saying no to the way people treat you.  If you are being treated badly or accepting bad behavior, it’s because you are allowing it.  I allowed my ex-husband to act up, not live up to God’s ideal of a good husband, and make some really bad decisions.  One day I had enough and said “I’m done.  I’m not living this way anymore.”  I said no to his behavior.  It actually came out of my mouth before I knew it.  Standing behind it took courage and conviction.  That no changed my life for the better.

The power of no…

Saying no is powerful.  If you find yourself always doing things you don’t want to do, say no.  The initial reaction might shock some people, but that’s ok.  And for goodness sake, don’t feel guilty.  Take your power, build your confidence, allow others to shine , allow yourself to shine and say no.  You’re worth it!

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